Success, a Question

One evening sometime in June 2011, I took a tricycle ride home. The driver asked me, “Ma’am kay ano ka nagpakyaw na damo pa man dyip tikadto San Jose? Ginkakapoy ka?”  I leaned a bit forward and turned my head to the left to get a clearer glimpse of his time-weathered countenance that was blurry under the beams of the dim street lights. I slowly replied, “Libre ko ini ha ak kalugaringon mano.” I saw a smile crawling from the corners of his lips and serious thoughtfulness leapt from his eyes. When they met, I saw his young dead ringer who said, “Maupay iton,” and to it I replied, “Salamat mano.” As we progressed in travel he told me bits of his life: he never finished college; he resides in a rented house with his wife and two teenage daughters; everyday is financially challenging; he pays boundary to the owner of the tricycle; and, his happiness especially when he is home. Our encounter dissolved into silence as we shortened the distance to my destination but in my forever I will call him Manong Driver.

Thank you to whoever made this drawing. No source was cited.

I was recently asked, “What is success?” I saw their shoulders stooped and eyes averted under my steady stare after I said, “I do not know.” It was as if I committed a great social blunder that was beyond reparation. It would have been friendlier to say that success is the achievement of recognition, fame and glory in any chosen field; educational attainment that eases the hustles and bustles of job procurement and respect; or, financial stability that could afford the most recent models of mobile phones,  computers, game gadgets, houses, travel, and other modern luxuries. However they felt or whatever they thought were of no consequence to me because at the back of my mind the smile of the young dead ringer lingered and a miniscule of that memory badgered the thinking me with these questions, “How about Manong Driver? He does not have any of those; does it mean he is not successful? Does it mean he is a failure?”

People often say the phrase BIG TIME with awe and admiration on their face and when asked the cause of their reaction the usual answers are wealth, fame, and power. When relatives from abroad come home for a vacation they become instant celebrities because of their perceived affluence. Taclobanons and visitors rushed on June 25 to Robinson’s Place to see some currently popular Manila-based actors; the event caused one of the heaviest traffic jams by far in the area. When VP Binay came to Tacloban I saw at least a hundred of photos proclaiming proximity and acquaintance posted on Facebook by several friends and acquaintances. But, are they successful?

Everyone wants to be called successful or be associated with success; nobody would want to be called a failure or be associated with it. The pursuit for success has pushed individuals such as Nelson Mandela from disadvantageous backgrounds to strive and achieve greater political and social statuses. The consummation of the pursuit has brought about happiness and exhilaration to those who circumvent all barriers. Nevertheless, its absence has driven away some people from attending reunions with classmates or relatives; led a friend to commit suicide; and, has turned the eyes of good hearted people green thereby making them behave like dogs catching their tails. Nevertheless, the want to be seen as successful has imprisoned lots of souls such as the Ampatuans in the cages of avarice for wealth, fame, or power.

The question though that matter for me now is this, is success necessary that we live pursuing it? If it is, then I will redefine it so that next time when asked I would be able to properly reply. If it is, then it would mean doing best what one does best; loving what one is doing; giving the best in one’s self to bring out the best in others; not quitting just because one fears failure; and, above all, not pursuing it… let it be an afterthought of a fruitful, wise, just and happy life. Even Manong Driver does not want to be called unsuccessful… a failure, because he is not.